What would happen if.... (7/25 edition)

...if I gave in to Down Under David's request for before and after pictures of my haircut. (Sorry, I still haven't put the knee-high socks back on for a picture yet.)

I'm working with an accountant on a common client whose initials are KJY. I simply HOPE that the J does not stand for Jelly.

So, yeah, I got the haircut last night. Is "barbress" a word? I want to say that I tipped the barbress five dollars. I could say stylist, but really, does it LOOK like my hair was done by a stylist???

My wife was born in Virginia and moved to Staten Island when she was like eight. So while most of the drawl is gone, she still will say she waits "on line" (the NYC way) instead of "in line" when she is queued up at the Department of Motor Vehicles. (Or as it's known in Connecticut, Vehicals.) Just one of those weird regionalisms that freaks me out when I hear it. Waiting on line, to me, is what you do when your Internet connection is freaking slow.

I wonder if HBO would try to sue, if the Emmy awards restricted their categories to over-the-air broadcast channels only. It seems odd that cable shows go up for the same awards. I haven't had HBO for 20 years, I have no idea if their shows are any good.

I enjoy taking a Friday off, and then coming back on Monday and finding an overnight-express envelope (like FedEx) in my mailbox. Gee, I hope that wasn't a RUSH job that I wasn't around to act upon last week....

I'm not a big fan of poker games with "community cards". I would like the World Series of Poker to feature Dealer's Choice rounds. If someone wants "day baseball with rainouts", then that's what gets played. (By the way, I'd like an informal poll of which readers know how that game is played.) Then the next guy wants 5-card draw, jacks-or-better, progressive....spice it up a bit, huh?

I've ordered my Maroon 5 tickets for October. Apparently, though, the trick is not to be first logging into Ticketmaster right at 10 am when seats go on sale, but to be late by a couple of minutes, as earlier people's seats become available after their Internet connection screws up, or they botch the word verification. (you know, after waiting online....)

I would like Dan Mega to host a version of ESPN's "Who's Now?" competition among our fellow bloggers. Because he is just SO Now.

Roasted pistachios are awesome. It's a close race between them and roasted almonds, except almonds come already out of their shells, whereas sometimes pistachios are hard to open. I've been known to slam my stapler on my desk here to try to pry one or two open.

(I knew I used up my best thoughts yesterday.....)

Next week I'll be in Maine Wednesday to Sunday...so no list next week.